Shyness is often hereditary. If you know a shy person, chances are their mother or father was shy too. However, today there are more reasons to be shy or reserved. Cyber bullying is rampant and the playground can be a jungle, where the fittest and most confident thrive and the quiet or different kids can wither.
Some schools do a great job of dealing with the shy ones and the bullies, but most do not see what’s going on and if the child is well behaved it can be just ignored until the compulsory speech. That’s when the sh*%#t hits the fan.
Don’t wait. If you know your little one is reserved, do something about it. Start with encouraging play dates and watch how they interact. Is your child talking? Is your child laughing and chatting or are they just on screens? Discourage playing on screens as they do not help communication skills.
Encourage the child to answer adults by looking in their eye and speaking up. Make it positive and fun and do not sound like there is a problem (though there is).
Teach them how to ask questions when in a social situation, like about weather, school, future and anything they might be interested in. Give them opportunities to talk about their day and to elaborate with details. Model this behaviour.
Encourage them to talk about their feelings and to explain things using details, colours and adjectives. Play board games and read together, asking questions about what has happened and what they think will happen.
If none of this works, seek professional help from me.I have ideas and resources to help and a record of success.
Judith Field Direct Speech